I Believe In: Letting Your Kids Try.

January 9, 2012 By 7 Comments

I think a lot about my small people: Who they are growing up to be and how I can be guiding them.  Am I always shaping them with the love I intend, or do I let life, impatience and my own to-do list get in the way?

Last week, I shared my Beliefs for 2012.  Now, each week, I will begin to share with you, my beliefs about parenting.  These are the premises that guide who I am as a mother and who I hope my small people will grow up to be. These are things to do with your children.  

This one requires throwing cleanliness and patience out the window.

I Believe in Letting Them Try.  I Believe In Telling Them I Will Clean Up When They Do.

I want them to make the effort.  I want them to believe they CAN.  And?  I want to reward that effort.

This picture is my small people making their own lunches this morning.  They chose to do it on their own.  In fact, they surprised me with it.  They made a huge mess.  They licked the peanut butter spoon.  We were even running a little late.  But I loved it.  Because they can do it.

And somewhere along the way, I taught them they could.  And when I told them I’d clean up?

MAGIC.

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I’m Raising a Reader

September 6, 2011 By 10 Comments


Let’s be clear.  My small people have more athletic ability in their pinkie toes than I do in my entire body.

My brief, but traumatic, athletic career included a broken knee cap, a broken wrist, a sprained knee, a sprained wrist, three broken fingers, a concussion and a knocked out front tooth. All by the time I was nine.  It is, therefore, no surprise that I still duck when I see a ball coming my way AND my five year old son is apt to correct my form.

And by correct, I mean roll his eyes and then approach me slowly to actually SHOW me how it is supposed to be done.  And this includes all sports.  I have been coached on throwing a baseball, kicking a soccer ball, and RUNNING.  I am a sad, sad specimen of an athletic wannabe mom.

So the small people who excel at all-things-ball-bat-and-running related?  I, at times, have feared their DNA does not include ANYTHING from me.

Well, I did fear that. But not anymore.

I am raising a READER.  And you know what?  Excuse me while I yell this from the top of my house: She gets that from me.

My small girl started to read in Kindergarten. Last year, in first grade, she developed an aptitude for it and began to ask for books. But, at the time, she still preferred to have me read TO her.  But now…. that has changed.  Books are first on her list of, ‘may I please have’….AND she now begs to read TO ME.

And even better?  This picture was taken today.  She curled up on my bed with a book of her choosing and she read peacefully.  She is on page 220 of a chapter book she started on Friday.  **beams with pride**

At her age, I LOVED to read.  At bedtime, I used to sneak into the bathroom, faking a tummy ache, just to continue to be lost in one story after another. And now?  Guess who is turning her light back on to read after lights out?

Maybe we do share a little DNA.

 

Filed Under: Recent Posts, Small people Tagged With: , , , , ,

Anheuser Busch Family Talk About Drinking Roundtable Highlights

September 2, 2011 By 7 Comments

It may be a conversation you have yet to broach with your children – underage drinking.

But starting to chat with them when they are young is ideal. By young, I mean preschool.  And by ‘chat’, I don’t mean lecture in a stern voice.

I recently hosted a live virtual roundtable for Anheuser Busch on their Family Talk About Drinking Facebook page. I chatted with two experts, MJ Corcoran, a certified parent coach who helped to revamp the program and Kathy Casso, the VP of Corporate Social Responsibility at Anheuser Busch. The Family Talk program is a guide to help you begin the conversation about underage drinking with your children when they are young, stick with it when they are in middle school and continue it into high school and college. The program lasted 40 minutes –  but these are the highlights.

I’m so proud of this project… I hope you take the time to watch.

Tell me – what do you think?

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That Mom Award I Didn’t Win….

August 24, 2011 By 19 Comments

I was watching out the window….  you know, pretending NOT to be watching out the window.

He hopped out of the car first, turning around to help his big sister down.

As they made their way up the front walk, their second full day of school already a memory, she moved into the lead…clearly the expert in being dropped off after school. She turned around a few times, making sure her kindergarten brother was close behind.

I watched discreetly.  They were smiling and hurrying to the door, anxious to spill the days events at my feet. I did a few mental hand-springs: I have this down.  Would you look at them?  Uniforms still mainly clean (despite the small dude’s morning run through the sprinklers with the dog – IN said uniform – he claimed he was HOT), backpacks on tired little shoulders, actually looking out for each other.  I thought to myself, “I bet they even ate their grapes.”

This back-to-school business is a piece of cake.  I win.  Whatever the Mom Award is for making it through the first couple of days of school with your kids and your sanity intact…..  that award is mine.

“Mommy?” sweet hands reach for mine .  Those big blue eyes have a serious question.

“Yes, Buddy…..”, I waited.

“Am I a girl?”  I can tell he’s worried.

“No, Coop… you are, most definitely, a boy.  Why?”

“Because a boy today said, ‘Are you a girl?’ to me and then pointed to the boy next to him and said, ‘You see Scott**, he’s not a girl…he’s a boy because he has a haircut like mine.”

Coop has the most amazing hair ever. Ever.  Thick. Blond. Wavy curl.  He has good hair, but it is longer than the other boys in his class.  We like it that way. More importantly, HE likes it that way.

I sat myself down right there on the floor in the entry way.  You know that whole ‘piece-of-cake’ thing?  Who was I kidding?  I mentally, and gracefully decline said Mom Award. I don’t know if I will ever be any good at this parenting thing.  Seeing your kids sad….or wounded… it doesn’t get easier.  And I know I won’t always have the answers. This is just the beginning.

I never took my eyes from his, “Buddy….  you know you are a boy.  Sometimes people say things that aren’t nice.  That’s ok.  We know that words can hurt.  You tell him you ARE a boy and walk away. ”

My sweet girl chimed in, brushing his blond hair from his forehead, “Buddy, its ok….  I’ll protect you.”

And with that?

I suddenly felt like I was winning again.

**name changed so as not to identify anyone in the class

 

Filed Under: Breaking my heart, Featured Content, Recent Posts Tagged With: , , , ,

Wordless Wednesday – Favorite School, Favorite Small People

August 23, 2011 By 7 Comments

My small people have now started school.  Two weeks ago, I took them to MY last school, the University of San Diego.  I snapped this picture (with my brand new Nikon!) and it shows everything I love about that small dude and small girl…. and everything that is gorgeous about USD.

The small girl plans to attend as a Freshman in 2021.

Filed Under: A little piece of Heaven, Featured Content, Recent Posts, Wordless Wednesday Tagged With: , , , ,

I Support My Child’s School My Way

August 17, 2011 By 1 Comment

Just as I imagined I would be married by 21 with kids by 23 (wrong and wrong), I pictured myself as the consummate Home Room Mom.  You know…. the one up at school 3 days a week, planning every holiday party with gusto?

I’m not.

At all.

And, gosh…. for my sweet girl’s sake, I really want to be…. because she is still at an age where she really wants me there.  And for the past few years I’ve been there, but my gusto has been a touch absent.  Don’t get me wrong, my happy face is firmly in place in the classroom, but my heart simply isn’t in the planning.of.every.single.detail as it relates to all class events.  And as much as I loved making these ornaments with Delaney’s class last Christmas (they are gorgeous, aren’t they?) they weren’t my idea – I had to ask on Twitter for something brilliant.  Fortunately, there are brilliant volunteer minds out there. (hint, hint friends… many of them are on Twitter and Facebook – ask and they will answer!)

Quite honestly, I don’t want to be in charge.

I just want to be there.

And for the first time, with both of my small people at the same school, for the same hours, I will be able to volunteer in small shifts, on a more regular basis.  I know schools need lots of hands and lots of hearts.  And what is beautiful, in my mind, about volunteering at your child’s school, is that you have the opportunity to give what you can, what works best for you and your family – be it an hour or ten, twenty dollars or two-hundred.

In the past, I volunteered for large events.  Events that required lots of woman hours – lots of planning. What I want to do now?  The small stuff.  What matters to me is what matters to my small people – that they see my face.  At school. I don’t want to volunteer for the big-behind-the scenes stuff….. I want to actually be there when I can.  I want to help at lunch time and recess, at school fairs and book events. When my reward is a giggle, a smile and a wave.  Maybe even a point and a whisper, “that’s my mommy”. They are still at an age when it is cool to see  ’Mommy’ at the school. I’m smart enough to know that won’t last forever.  I just hope it lasts through this year.

I want to take advantage of that as long as I can.

free online sign up sheets with volunteerspot

 

I SUPPORT MY SCHOOL.. MY WAY! And I’m joining VolunteerSpot’s sponsored Back To School campaign to help raise visibility for parent involvement in schools.

Save time {and sanity} and get more parents involved at school with VolunteerSpot.com!

VolunteerSpot’s FREE online signup sheets make it easy to organize parents and signup to help for just about anything: classroom helpers, snack schedules, carnivals, library volunteers, parent-teacher conferences and more….  No more ‘Reply-All’ email chains or clipboard sign up sheets! Please share with your room mom, teachers and parent leaders…

Plus there’s a huge Sweepstakes on VolunteerSpot’s Facebook page!
Win $500 worth of school supplies for YOUR School! Enter here

Filed Under: Featured Content, Give Good Get Good, Recent Posts Tagged With: , , , ,

How do you want to be celebrated on Mother’s Day?

May 7, 2011 By 4 Comments

The celebration of Motherhood, for me, is wrapped up in the tiny details – it is in the dandelions clutched in tiny fists, presented to me as Royal flowers, it is the unexpected, “Mommy?….  I love you.” from the quiet of the backseat of the car… it is the smile I can’t hide when one of the small people holds the door open for someone or says, ‘thank you’ without a prompt….  It is in hearing the small dude say he can’t wait to be at the same school as his sister so he can hug her at recess or the small girl congratulate her brother on a school project.  Individually, these moments are but grains of sand gathering on the shore of my life as a mother…  but collected?

They mean I am doing something right.

And THAT is worth celebrating.

In the sea of guilt that threatens, some days, to take me down, it matters to me to know there are moments, there are glimpses and golden reminders.

I know, for some mothers – being celebrated on Mother’s Day means a ‘day off’ – heading to the spa, a massage, a pedicure, no laundry…..  and for others, it means to be surrounded by family.  It seems to me that both age and the length of time you have been a mother factor in to your preferences here.  As a brand new mom – you are enamored by all things motherhood…. You wouldn’t dream of spending your first Mother’s Day without the being who made you so….  When you are in the throes of the crazy – the taxi driving, the soccer games, the PTA, the homework, the 9 year old or teen angst – you can’t seem to help but scream for the Calgon but as your children begin to develop a sense of their own lives….  Distancing themselves naturally, you long to grab them by the shoulder and pull them back.

I know, if it was up to my mom – we would be with her from sunrise to sunset.  But I have friends who would be happy with breakfast in bed and a day off.

For me….  I think I fall somewhere in the middle.  Now, don’t go accusing me of being wishy-washy.  I want to spend time with my small people.  I want to be surrounded by everything that reminds me of the joy of being a mom – I want to be hugged a million times – I want smiles and little-bitty hands curled in mine – I want eyes that look at me – still somehow sure I have the answers. – I want my children to get along…. AND I don’t want to do the laundry or make dinner.

So there.

Who’s with me?  How would you like to be celebrated on Mother’s Day?

This Mother’s Day conversation is sponsored by a company I love (and use!) Tiny Prints.  I love that they have given me some beautiful things to think about as Mother’s Day approaches.  All of their Mother’s day cards(and Father’s day cards too!) are fully customizable and can be sent straight to the recipient. You can even schedule the cards to be sent ahead of time too.

 

Filed Under: A little piece of Heaven, Featured Content, Recent Posts Tagged With: , , , ,
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