A Letter to my Daughter on her Birthday
She has magic in her eyes.
Do you see it? The wealth of possibilities just bubbling over? She believes absolutely anything is possible. She thinks I can do anything….and is just beginning to question if I will be around forever.
She makes me want to wear a cape, to sweep her away from any tough situation, to wrap her in my arms and keep her safe. Everyday.
This weekend she turned six.
It sounds so trite to say the last 2,190 days have been blinked away, but it most defintiely feels as though they have. I blinked and she was born. I blinked and she could walk. I turned around to cook dinner and she was talking. I stopped for 15 minutes to have another baby and she could sing, turn a cartwheel and play soccer. I ran to the grocery store and she up and graduated from Kindergarten. (damn grocery store)
Of course, what I’m neglecting here, are the million hugs and “I love you, Mommys”. Each one of those is etched into my soul and though they are fleeting - they are the most special because they mean she feels loved, she feels cared for and respected.
I have tried and failed no less than a dozen times this week to write down how I feel about my daughter, Delaney. This is what I finally have to say…..
A quick note to my birthday girl:
My Sweet Girl,
When you were born, I was so taken by your dark hair and those chocolate eyes, I couldn’t bear to look away. I forced myself to let other people hold you, if only to spread the joy that seeped from your pores.
I now find myself having a similar experience. While you have grown from a helpless infant to an ’I can do it’ toddling toddler to the independent little treasure you are now, I have often held my breath, hoping I would know when to hold your hand and when to stand behind you with a little push.
When I look into your eyes, I see possibilities. You truly believe ANYTHING can happen.
And that is magic….
The kind of magic I will bottle and do my best to sprinkle over you as you sleep each and every night. You can’t put a price on that kind of faith in the world.
During this last year - your sixth, I have seen the most significant changes in you - more than walking, more than talking….. As these are tremendous milestones, they seem rooted in the physical. What I am witnessing now is the growth of your mind, of your heart. You are learning compassion and empathy. You are learning to give, to hurt, to be you.
I am so incredibly proud of the little girl who couldn’t come up with what she wanted for her birthday - who didn’t even ask ALL DAY when she could open presents and the one who was overjoyed to receive a small piggy bank, a few books and a Kidz Bop CD. I am in awe of the sweet girl, once so timid, who made a huge birthday invite list - unwilling to leave anyone out and who actually took charge while her friends were here rather than waiting for someone else to step up.
You are this beautiful little soul. From you I have learned patience, I have experienced family, and I have evolved. I am a better person for having you in my life.
Happy, Happy Birthday Baby Girl…..wishing you a million days that reflect the possibilities you see.
I love you with all my heart.
Love, Mommy
What I learned from Kindergarten (my daughter’s)
Dear Delaney~
A first grader? YOU?? Aren’t you still my baby?
When did you learn to walk and talk? To run, jump, swing and swim?
Did I blink? You really aren’t a Kindergartner anymore?
Did the year fly by for you?
For me it felt like a few snaps, a quick turn of the jump rope, a roll of the eyes, and sweet little song.
I know you learned alot….I can see it in your smile, in the way you hold your head. I can tell by the way you look people in the eyes and say please and thank you instead of hiding behind me. I feel it when you want to walk without holding my hand…..and of course when you won’t let go. I can see it in how you treat your little brother.
I have learned a few things myself this year.
What I learned while you were in Kindergarten:
What you are doing each day at school is as much about what ISN’T in your official curriculum as what is
You really are right most of the time. If you argue vehemently that your Girl Scout patches go on the back of your vest, you are probably right - even though it seems silly to me.
Holding hands when you head out in to the world is still the best idea ever.
Do as I do is a much better motivator than Do as I say
Apparently 5 is the age when you begin to think your Mom has turned the corner onto Uncool Blvd. I was preparing for 15. (though I know you are still the best snuggler when it is just you and me)
I miss you. I know you need to grow, but I miss you.
I hurt when you hurt…. whether it is your skinned knees and elbows or your feelings.
You being YOU is both fabulous and frightening.
You are so tremendously creative - your drawing, journaling, coloring - it is amazing.
And your singing - don’t ever stop using this special talent.
You still need my hugs. Which is good….because I definitely need yours.
You remind me to believe in the world, to believe in myself and to experience joy as though it is my j-o-b.
I am a better person, a better mother for knowing you.
You are beautiful, intelligent, goofy (just like your daddy) and most importantly, Kind.
I am proud of you, Sweet Girl.
Could you just slow down on the whole growing-up-thing? I need you to need me a bit longer.
Love, Mommy
P.S. Nice work on the counting, the telling time, the reading. You are remarkable.
P.P.S You are welcome for the cookies.
Win a Reunion with your Mom - New BlissTV Episode
Live too far away from your mom and want to be reunited? Watch to learn how….
Talking Olympics and “Thank you, Mom” with Silver Medalist Julie Chu
I first met Olympian Julie Chu (women’s hockey!) at the Vancouver Olympics….now with a Silver Medal in hand, Julie chatted with me about her Olympic experience, the luxury of having her family to support her and her gratitude to Procter & Gamble.
Happy Mother’s Day
A Mother’s Day Message from me and the small people 
Thank you for the Second Chance with My Mom
When I was 18 years old, a senior in high school, my mom was given six weeks to live.
Her diagnosis progressed from a bleeding ulcer to pancreatitis to pancreatic cancer. She was fading away before our eyes, losing weight, struggling to mask the unbearable pain from my dad, brother and I.
We didn’t have health insurance. The City of Hope in Los Angeles came to our rescue….taking her in, performing her surgery and sharing the news that she had been, amazingly, misdiagnosed.
She did not have cancer.
What I remember vividly from that time…..saying goodbye to her. Since it was possible she wouldn’t make it through surgery, we each….my dad, my brother and I, all had moments with her. Moments where she struggled to pack a future’s worth of advice into ten minutes.
Be nice to your brother. Take care of your dad - he’s going to need you. Remember you can be and do absolutely anything you want. Remember, no matter what, I will always be with you.
We walked with her as far as we could. They put her on the elevator, facing out. My dad, my little brother and I stood up straight, held hands, smiled to surround her with strength, mouthed ‘I love you’s’ and held our breath as the ice cold doors slid shut.
And then we crumbled.
Surgery was half the time it should have been. The doctors swore what they were seeing in her was cancer, but it wasn’t.
She would recover. And she did.
She was there when I graduated from high school and from college. She helped me get ready on my wedding day. She has held both of my babies.
She is a Nana. She is a wife. And she is my mom.
Even though she lives almost 2000 miles away….and I don’t see her nearly as often as I would like. I know that I can. And that matters.
Thank you, Mum - for always being there. I love you.
Do you live far away from your mom and would like to be reunited with her for a special occasion?
Procter & Gamble is doing something amazing through “Thank you, Mom Reunions”. They are reuniting more than 100 moms and kids (between now and November) for those special milestone moments.
- Head to ThankYouMom.com
- Submit your story (100 words or less) explaining why you would like to be reunited with your mom (or the mom figure in your life)
- Encourage your friends and family to vote.
- 15 winners will be chosen every month between now and November
- Winners will receive a travel voucher to help cover the cost + a digital video camera to capture the reunion (which you can share on ThankYouMom.com if you want!)
Good Luck!
From the ThankYouMom.com site:
ELIGIBILITY: This promotion is open only to residents of the 49 United States (excluding Maine) and the District of Columbia who are 18 years of age or older at time of entry. Employees of Procter & Gamble, its affiliates, subsidiaries, advertising, promotion and internet agencies and their immediate family members and/or those living in the same household of each are not eligible. All federal, state and local laws and regulations apply. Void in Maine and where prohibited by law.
SOBCon 2010: What I Know For Sure
Five hours of silence. That’s the length of a car ride between Chicago and St. Louis.
That is simply the beginning of the stretch of time I will need to process the wisdom and heart that hugged me this weekend.
I am a new kid on this social media block….so, I walked in to SOBCon knowing I have a lot to learn. But I’m also smart enough to know that the learning really shouldn’t ever stop.
I took no pictures. And no videos. (except for some fantastic karaoke with @PhilGerb and @unmarketing ).
I just wanted to BE. To listen, To ABSORB. To meditate on the brilliance. To decide which of the gems applied most to me. Is it silly (and decidedly girly) to admit I had revelations that almost brought me to tears?
It was magic. And learning. And bonding. And deciding.
I tweeted quite a bit as I listened…..hoping to share some of the moments that touched me. You can see the whole SOBCon stream here.
As I settle back in to my life, (You know, the one as a mom, wife, and working-my-tail-off-gal) and prepare to move forward, these are the messages I will repeat to myself….this is what I now know for sure:
“Fear is the mind killer. The opposite of fear is trust….. If we can’t trust ourselves, who can we trust? I invite you to set aside your fear – those are the kinds of leaders we need now.” ~LizStrauss
“We don’t need dreamers, we need leaders: People who have faced their fear and moved on” ~Liz Strauss
“You don’t want to build a coliseum - you want to raise a barn. It isn’t, ‘if you build it, they will come….’ it is, ‘if they build it, they will bring their friends, they will own it, protect you, care for you” ~Liz Strauss
“Find a sweet spot between viable niche and the ability to solve a problem that makes you come alive” ~Jonathan Fields
“Every person is the person who can set the mission and the vision. You are in control of how you accomplish tasks and whether you choose to come alive.” ~Jonathan Fields
“The Moment you choose not to execute, you fail.” ~Jonathan Fields
“Keep the bigger vision in the back of your head, but commit to taking action every day.” ~Jonathan Fields
“How do you know it is going to be a success? You DON’T. Just do it!” ~Dave Taylor
“You need to define failure and success. What happens when you do succeed??? Are you afraid of success?” Wendy Piersall
“You don’t need permission from others to follow your dreams” LOVE THIS (~someone brilliant)
“It isn’t if the glass is half full, or half empty, but WHAT is in the glass?” ~Hank Wasiak
“Create your signature presence - substance, sizzle, soul.” ~Hank Wasiak
“Be a vulnerable admirer - admire the hell out of people. Mentors matter - be a mentor and find yours - imitate shamelessly and often.” ~Hank Wasiak
“Power is who you are. NOT what you have.” ~Hank Wasiak
“Forget Perfection. Pursue Progress.” ~Hank Wasiak
“Talk, talk, talk about what you want to do. At some point, SHUT UP and DO IT!” ~Sheila Scarborough
“The narrower your target, the wider your opportunity.” Becky McCray
“If people don’t know who you are, they aren’t going to trust you.” ~Chris Garrett
“What is your elevator speech? If you don’t have a way to tell people what you do, GET ONE!” ~Shelly Kramer
“Thinking about doing social media? Be there. Prepare to spend time everyday. Spend 2-5 hours a week just listening online.” ~Amber Naslund
“As a leader you have to show your passion and SHOUT it from the rooftops.” ~Terry Starbucker
“Stop thinking ‘fear of failure’, start thinking ‘fear of not learning’” ~Scott Porad
“If you have a vision, you have to be adaptable and flexible.” ~Scott Porad
“Trust = visibility + credibility + relevance, divided by real time.” ~Rick Murray
“If the only reason you can think of NOT to do something is because you are scared, then you need to DO IT.” ~Steve Farber
“Do what you love in the service of people who love what you do.” Steve Farber
“The OS!M (Oh Sh*t Moment) - a natural thing for every time you take a risk or make a commitment.” ~Steve Farber
“The Greatest Leaders make others greater than themselves.” ~Steve Farber
” Stop collecting recipes, start making food - open a restaurant!” ~Chris Brogan
“Rule of Success: Be anywhere. Be anywhen.” ~Chris Brogan
“Understanding yourself as a story is the only way you’ll know where you are going next.” ~Chris Brogan
“Persistence overcomes resistance.” ~JayJayFrench
“You build your network before you need it. They will take care of you. Your community will always take care of you.” ~Liz Strauss
When I walked into the room at SOBCon, I was nervous. I had butterflies. I’ve always believed that anything worth doing will give you that feeling. It is a reminder of the potential greatness of the experience.
I figured this event would be all business with a side of people. But in fact, it was all people, all love, with a side of business.
Liz Strauss and Terry Starbucker made sure of it.
Now, it is up to me.
I know this for sure.
